A Reminder...

It's been two weeks since my last post, for which I apologize, but I've still been working, I promise. 

This has been, by far, the hardest two weeks of training. I've felt ill while running, and it seems like I hit the wall just after I step out my front door. 

I find myself frustrated by my lessened abilities. I was a rock star runner a month and a half ago, doing far better than I ever expected and it felt great. Hard work, effort, and dedication had really paid off. I was so proud.

Flash forward to today, when I ran 10 miles and I thought I wasn't going to make it home. "Ran 10 miles" isn't really an accurate statement, either. I went ten miles, but I have never stopped, walked, and gasped for air so much. I probably ran 9. Probably.

Now, it was 90 degrees. But the last two weeks have been filled with runs that are so far from "fun" I can't even believe I was sort of enjoying this at one point. My training schedule is screwy because I'm making up for lost time, my confidence is blown, and I was actually near tears while running today (not really that hard, I now understand why people on The Biggest Loser cry all the time).

So what am I doing to make myself feel better?* I came home and watched several Team World Vision videos to remind me of all the good I am doing by running. The good stuff that's not just for me. This is the video I watched to remember exactly why this charity is so necessary. And here's a little video from World Vision Australia with Hugh Jackman in it. I like being on the same team as Wolverine! President Clinton and daughter Chelsea are on board too, partnering with World Vision and Proctor and Gamble to give water purification packets to people to make this water safe:
 

This is Confiance. She has to travel 30 minutes each way to
be rewarded with this filthy water.

The packets, distributed by TWV, help turn the murky green water from this borehole to this:

Confiance is on the right, and much happier now!

 I'm pretty convinced that people run with charities so that on days they want to kill themselves for choosing to run a marathon, they will realize that it is a good decision, you are doing something to make the world a better place, and those things are far more important than the fact that your legs want to fall off. I am so proud to work with an organization that provides "sustainable sources of clean drinking water" by working with "protected springs, boreholes," clean water wells, and rain capture systems. This fantastic charity "is now providing clean drinking water to a new person every 30 seconds." If you'd like to read more about Confiance and the Clintons' visit you can find the full post here.

So please, help me convince my legs and feet that their pain is worth these people's gain. Donate to my fund here and help children like Confiance gain access to safe, clean water for their whole lives.

*Note: I also ordered a big Giordano's deep dish pizza to make myself feel better. One of these coping mechanisms was super healthy. (The other was super tasty.)

Out for a Month, In for a Weekend

Ever wonder if someone could take an entire month off of marathon training and still do the race? Well folks, we are about to find out. My 10 mile run was on July 10th, and my first real run back was on August 9th. 

An update: I did my PT exercises diligently last week. They hurt oh so bad but made me feel so much better. I continued to ride my bike (talk about saddle sore. Yeesh!) and do my ab workouts (back to level 3 by August... made one goal at least!). One of my extremely long bike rides took me from Lawrence toward downtown:

How bout that skyline, eh?

And even further south, to the other side of downtown (by the aquarium). 

That black building that stands on it's own off to the right? Same as the black building that stands on it's own at the left of the other picture. I went faaar.

On Friday I went on my test run. My wonderful friend Janell went with me to keep me company and support my nerves. And I did it! It felt a little tight at moments, but I had no pain in the heel at all. What a relief!

The next day I was eager to go again, and my boyfriend ran circles around me (I am not joking). I was slow as a snail, but still no pain. 
 
Because I'm a little late on this week's post I'll update you all the way. Monday I got to do five miles at an increased interval. How exciting! The next day went something like this:

 Me: How are you feet?
 Feet: We're swell, thank you for asking!
 Me: Excellent, everything's fine and groovy the--OHMYGOSH THE PAIN!
 Thighs: We thought you quit the marathon! We don't like yooooouuuu!!!!

So cross training is great, and sooo important.... but your muscles will definitely be different. I took 2 days off running and hit the PT hard on Tuesday and today, and I get to go on a five mile RUN run tomorrow. Hopefully everything will be back in order. (Although I'm sure my thighs will continue to threaten a coup the day after.)

I'll be honest: I'm a little nervous that the rug is going to get yanked out from under me and it's all going to hurt very badly again and I won't be able to do my 'thon. After living with the pain of retail feet for years, and the tendinopathy for a month, this near pain free feeling that I'm having seems too good to be true. I don't trust it. But I'm going to keep doing exactly what the PT says and hope for the best. Because hope is awesome.

And here's a flower that I meant to post ages ago, forgot about, and then found on my phone today. Because it's hopeful!!

This Post Was Brought To You Today....

This post was brought to you today by the letter D and the number 7. D for the word of the week: discouraged, and 7 for the number of days I have been that way.

Discouraged Bear says "Bears can be discouraged too!"

I'll be honest. As I was writing the last post, where I talked about all my specatcular achievements I already knew this was coming. I began to notice it on Sunday, before the 5k, and felt a little pain while running the race. I went out Tuesday thinking "well, yesterday my Achilles tendon hurt a little, but I'm going to do my run today and take it really easy..." 

Really easy was not enough. It was a very painful run, and when I got home I knew I couldn't do that again anytime soon. Thank goodness it was a cutback week, meaning we got a bit of break in mileage because we'd come so far. I also new it was time for new shoes (bye bye paycheck). So the next day the only running I did was on the treadmill at a specialty running store as I tested out some new kicks. At the suggestion of the sales associate, who is also an avid runner, I have been mostly swimming and biking since then. And of course, I've been icing it since I learned of the issue.

In an attempt to feel less lazy, I did what I call a combo package on Saturday: 12 miles on the bike and what I think was about a 30 minute swim in the lake. I did feel less lazy, but man did it take a long time. I was able to complete my ab DVD yesterday, and did a torpid 3 mile run today with a small but persistent amount of pain. However, the rest and icing has brought the swelling down, and I have very little pain during the day when I'm walking and working.

All this has really scared me. I finally admitted it to myself over the weekend, and I spoke the words out loud on the phone tonight, surprised to find myself near tears. I'm no longer 100% sure that I will be able to complete the marathon. Up to this point I have really thought that nothing would stop me from crossing the finish line, even if I crawled it, but my faith has been shaken. I am frustrated by the fact that no amount of determination and pluck can get me through it if my body won't do it. And so I'm frightened that my big goal might not happen.

I'm also disappointed about the fundraising challenge I set myself. I have amazing friends and co-workers and five all-stars donated this week, surprising and delighting me. I am enormously grateful for them and for the $50 we raised (that's enough to give one person clean water for their whole life! What an awesome thing we've done!). But the goal was 10 people, and I only made it halfway. 

And that's how I feel about that.

Nothing to be done about that but thank Lizzie, Juan, Kate, Leah, and Janell for giving their hard earned dollars, and to try and get 5 more this week. Lizzie, Juan, Kate, and Leah, you will be in my mental list of supporters during mile six of the marathon, and Janell you are my first person to push me through big mile seven! I will be so happy to be thinking of you all on race day. Folks, the challenge is still going. Even though I didn't make it in the week I hoped for, I'm still going for those 10 donations! Let's make this week the week.

So maybe this was mopey, or had no moral, but this is how I'm feeling right now. I just needed a little moment to share my setbacks with you. I'm encouraged that I'm feeling a little better, and I will continue to convalesce this week as I take it easy. We'll see how it goes...

 

In Which This Girl Is On Fire.

The time is here! The weather has finally heated up. This has been great for my weekend outdoor activities and terrible for my runs. I am not a morning person, and therefore do not get up well to beat the heat and do my run at 6 am. (In fact, I've missed running group two weeks in a row because sleeping in on Saturdays is awesome.) I always do my run later in the day, but we are getting to the point where this is unbearable.

All this hot hot heat has made me think about how lucky I am. Lucky to be able to go for a walk, to the beach, or the zoo on weekends and enjoy it. Lucky to get back indoors where I have a window AC unit. (Not the height of glamour, I'll admit, but many don't even have that!) And lucky to have fresh water, which I drink all day every day. 

There's nothing better than coming back from a run and having a tall one, or an ice cold one after a hot outing on a Sunday, or even just re hydrating after a normal day of work. It feels good! It makes my body feel happy.

And then I think of the 1.1 billion people around the world who lack access to clean drinking water. Of the 4,200 children who die each day from dirty water. And it makes me super sad. Maybe this video will help you imagine what our world would be like if this were the case here in the US. (I don't know about you, but that video grossed me out in a big way.)

To be honest, my motivation for running has been tough to find the last week or so, but thinking about how I can impact with this global problem by fundraising and running has really helped to push me out the front door. If you want to learn more about this issue please visit Team World Vision's Website. If you are able, please donate either by clicking the link in the "my pages" section, or by clicking here. I am eternally grateful for the all the support you have been giving me in my effort to change the world.

The other day as I walked home in the 85 degree heat I stepped through a sprinkler that was watering the sidewalk (the sidewalk people! That's how lucky we are!) It felt deliciously cold and refreshing, and while I felt a little guilty, it also reminded me how appreciative people will be when we help bring water to their area. Don't believe me? Just look at this smile!